Silent Rose
by ATudorRose
Summary: 1923, Matthew makes an important find while on a business trip to New York. Post-S2, slight spoilers. T for later chapters. Story better than summary, please R&R!
1. Discovery

_This came into my head and I just had to get it out. It looks like it might turn into something quite long, and unfortunately, this is mostly setting the scene. For those of you who may not know, in the early 1920's alcohol was banned from the United States in what came to be known as the prohibition era. The song is 'Bound to You' from the movie Burlesque. Not particularly, historically accurate but I felt like it fit. Please review, they mean the world to me! Thanks a lot ;D! _

**December 31****st**** 1921**

**Missing Person!**

**Early this morning, Sir Richard Carlisle – prominent newspaper publisher – confirmed the disappearance of his wife of one year, Mrs. Mary Carlisle. Born Lady Mary Crawley, Mrs. Carlisle was a notoriously cold and sarcastic woman so it hardly comes as a surprise that her husband has not yet issued a search for her.**

February, 1923

New York City

"What shall we do tonight?" Molly asked walking into the room her husband and his guest, Mr. Crawley, was sitting in discussing a current case. This was Mr. Crawley's first visit to America and the Parkingsons had welcomed to successful English lawyer into their home, making it their mission to show him the wonders of New York City.

"How about a show?" John suggested.

"Perhaps. I'm dying for a drink though. I don't think I've ever gone this long without a drop of alcohol," he replied.

"Are you willing to bend the rules a little to get one?"

"At this point yes." Matthew had taken a rather strong liking to alcohol following Lavinia's death and was finding his stay in prohibition America incredibly difficult.

"It's decided then, let's go to a speakeasy!" Molly declared happily.

"A what?"

"A speakeasy. They are underground bars all over America. Which one should we go to?" John explained before turning his attention back to his wife.

"Silver Palace, of course! You are doing business with Mr. Crawley here; we simply must provide nothing but the best! And Silent Rose is headlining tonight, you know how I love to watch her."

"Ah, c'est bon idée!" John boomed in a comical French accent, "Dress in your finest, we will leave at 7:30."

In their finest clothes, they entered the grandest hotel in the city later that night. Walking straight through the lobby, they entered the labyrinth of corridors that led to all the rooms on the first floor, winding around and around until they came to a stop in front of room 100. John tapped the door lightly. From inside the door came the sound of a cautious reply.

"Yes?" it asked.

"It's Mr. and Mrs. Parkingson with a friend. It is so very cold outside and I haven't a coat. Please let us in."

Matthew was rather confused, as the hotel was well heated, but it all became clear to him when the door opened and instead of the room he was expecting, a steep staircase stood before them. They made their way past the little man behind the door and down the stairs, marching down another hallway until they came to a much grander doorway. An elegantly dressed valet opened the doors with a sweeping motion and Matthew drank in the breathtaking scene before him.

The room was huge with a long, busy bar against one wall, tables and booths covering every inch of available space. They were all facing an enormous stage that housed a magnificent grand piano and every other instrument needed for a first class jazz band. The light was low and cigarette smoke hung in the air, floating over the heads of elegant patrons. John smiled at Matthew's astonished expression, laughing and exclaiming, "Welcome to the real New York!"

They wound their way across the floor to an empty table at the front, very close to the stage. As they sat down, a band dressed in black and white suits began to play lively music that gave Matthew the impressing that the night was just kicking off.

John went off to get them some drinks and Molly began to tell Matthew the strange circumstances regarding the singer due to come on.

"She has the best voice I've ever heard," she started, "but that's not why everyone is so drawn to her, not really. It's the mystery that surrounds her."

"Oh?"

"Mmm, she showed up just over a year ago, out of nowhere. One night, there she was. I don't know her name, or anything about her past, this is the only place I ever even see her, never around the city.

She is British, I know that, and a friend of mine thinks she has the manner of the aristocratic ladies, but I don't know. She is either a runaway lady or a very good actress; it is all speculation mind you. Have you not had quite a few dealings with the aristocracy yourself?"

"A few."

"Well maybe you can shed some light on the matter. However, as exciting as that all is, I'm not particularly interested in where she is running from, more _what_ she is running from."

"Do you have a theory on that matter then?" Matthew inquired playfully, he was quite enjoying this tale.

"Indeed!" Molly leaned in conspiratorially, "I'm inclined to believe that she is trying to escape a broken heart."

"Oh really?"

"Yes. It's just something about the way she sings, the way she looks at everyone. And she has this necklace – one that she always wears, I've never seen he without it. I'm sure it was a gift from the mystery man, and now that I think about it, the aristocracy theory makes sense, and whoever gifted that must have had money."

"There is the possibility that she bought it for herself."

"I highly doubt that. Women don't buy themselves pieces of jewelry like that."

"I see." Matthew's mind inexplicably flashed back to the necklace he bought Mary for Christmas in 1919. It was a sun, to remind her of everything that is light when all is dark, and encrusted with brilliant red rubies, to show her spirit and the passion she had brought to life. He left all that on a note incased in the box which he had given to Anna to leave on Mary's bed, wanting the gift to be more intimate and private. He had signed the note 'I'm sorry, I love you. Matthew'. He knew he hadn't needed to sign his name, but he wanted her to see it all the same. Matthew had gotten on the first train to Manchester the next morning and had hardly seen her since.

John returned at that moment, just as the lights went down farther, making it almost black. The stage lights however, rose to their full brightness. The room went silent as the pianist stood up and walked up the front of the stage.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Silver Palace is proud to present… Silent Rose!"

All eyes turned to the corner of the stage and a collective gasp escaped the audience as the singer stepped out from behind the curtains and made her way to center stage.

Her delicate nude dress ended at the top of her thighs and was covered in a sheer black overlay that fell all the way to the ground. It hugged her beautifully to the hip where it then fell down in soft ripples to the floor. The gown was dripping in black jewels that glinted in the light; the ivory white skin of her leg seemed to glow as it peeked out from the thigh-high slit in the skirt. Her lips were painted a brilliant red and the black kohl around her eyes made her chocolate irises jump out against the porcelain skin of her face. Long, deep chestnut locks fell in perfect waves around her face splaying out over her neck and bare shoulders. Just a few strands were held out of her eyes, clipped back with a soft white rose. And then he saw it. The red sun, glittering in the spotlights, resting delicately atop her collarbone, Mary's collarbone. The lost Mary was standing before him on stage, looking absolutely ethereal, about to sing in New York's best speakeasy.

"Is that the necklace?" Matthew whispered to Molly.

"The very same."

If Matthew's heart had been pounding in his chest before, it stopped completely now. And then she opened her mouth.

"_Sweet love, sweet love, trapped in your love._

_I've opened up, unsure I can trust,_

_My heart and I were buried in dust,_

_Free me, free us._

_You're all I need, when I'm holding you tight,_

_If you walk away, I will suffer tonight."_

Her voice was strong and full, steadily gaining volume and engulfing the large room in rich, deep waves of music that rolled over the silent audience.

"_I've found a man I can trust, and boy I believe in us,_

_I am terrified to love for the first time,_

_Can you see that I'm bound in chains,_

_And finally found my way._

_I am bound to you,_

_I am bound to you."_

The sound resonated throughout the room and her eyes were glassy, staring off into the distance as if she was singing to someone who wasn't in the room. Her voice slid effortlessly up and down the scales, the words falling from her lips loaded with emotion and meaning. She performed a melody of love songs, telling the stories of broken and mended hearts, and while most of the songs were happy, they were infused with a sort of wistful longing, a definite sadness. The music changed again, morphing into the tune of the first song once more.

"_Suddenly the moments here, I embrace my fears,_

_All that I have been carrying, all these years,_

_Do I risk it all, come this far just to fall, fall?_

_I can trust, and boy I believe in us,_

_I am terrified to love for the first time._

_Can you see that I'm bound in chains,_

_And finally found my way_

_I am bound to you_

_I am, ooh, I am,_

_I'm bound to you"_

The last note hung in the air and she closed her eyes and lowered her head. She reopened her eyes, smiling at the audience as she gracefully accepted their thunderous applause.

From her place on the stage, she could hardly see the audience due to the bright stage lights. But as she scanned the crowd, her eyes met familiar ice blue ones and her breath caught in her throat. Her head whipped around in a double take, could it be? No, no it couldn't. But still… she knew those eyes. Before she could make out any more however, the thick velvet curtains were drawn across the stage and she was cut off from the audience.

"Rose, are you alright?" one of the band members asked.

"What? Yes, yes, sorry. Just thought I saw someone," and with that she hurried off to her dressing room, praying that her mind was playing tricks on her. Again.

Back outside, Matthew's mind was racing. Mary. Mary was here. He found her.


	2. All That Is Light

_So, she has been found, what will happen next? I still have no idea how long this story will end up being, but I'll get the third chapter up faster than I got this one up. I love this and, well, I couldn't really help what ended up happening…. ;-)!__ Matthew is in America on a business trip type excursion, something I'll try to explain more fully in the next chapter. I own nothing but the plot, as everyone well knows, so without further ado… _

His breath coming in shallow gasps, Matthew stood on shaking legs as he saw the pianist come out onto the floor.

"If you'll just excuse me…" he stammered, leaving the confused Parkingsons far behind. Weaving over to the man, Matthew tapped him on the shoulder and inquired as to where he could find the lady.

"Very sorry sir," he replied with a smirk, "but the lady is not inclined to take visitors after a show."

Matthew could tell that this line was well rehearsed and had repeated it to many eager men.

"I must insist. Its urgent family matters," Matthew persisted.

"Family, ehh?"

"Yes, please take me to her."

"Err, come with me then," he decided after a moment, remembering Rose's odd reaction after the show. The pianist led him off the floor and through the stage doors, bringing him into a dark, narrow corridor.

"Wait here," the pianist instructed before he entered a room off the corridor and closed the door behind him. Matthew could hear muffled voices from inside the room before the man stuck his head out of the door.

"If you know her family, what is the name of her father?" he asked.

Matthew smiled.

"Lord Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham."

The pianist looked back into the room and then opened it wide, letting Matthew in as he made his way out.

"An earl, ehh…you think you know a person…" he muttered, shaking his head as he let the door fall closed behind him. She was sitting at a well lit vanity in the corner, and he could see her playing with her necklace in the mirror.

"What is it? What happened?" she whispered, not looking at him.

"Nothing. I said that so I could get in to see you," he replied softly, still standing by the door. A heavy silence hung in the room, both full of a million and one things to say but neither quite sure how to begin. Mary felt as if she might explode, she was so full of emotion at feeling his presence and hearing his silky voice. His reflection in the mirror alone was testing her control so she didn't dare turn around and face him. Matthew couldn't stand it.

"Mary" he whispered, so many different inflections in his voice. It was a question, a statement, a plea, an expletive, fervent thanks.

"Oh Matthew!" she exclaimed, whirling around and facing him, springing to her feet as their eyes met. Without another word, they came together and embraced, Matthew burying Mary in his arms.

"I was so worried, Mary, I was so worried," Matthew spoke into her hair, voice overloaded. She looked up at him with tears in the eyes.

"Oh, I'm so sorry."

"I see you are wearing the necklace I gave you," he smiled, looking down at the glinting jewels.

"Every day. I never got a proper chance to thank you for it, so thank you. Thank you so much, it's the most beautiful piece of jewelry I've ever seen."

"It reminded me so much of you."

"Everything that is light when all is dark," she whispered

"All the passion brought to life," he murmured.

"It's been so dark," she told him so softly he wasn't even sure she said it.

"Without any passion," he finished, staring into her glowing eyes. It was all too much, finally seeing her, knowing she was safe, holding her tightly in his arms; he lowered his head to hers and sighed when their lips met, feeling her soft lips under the thick red lipstick. It quickly turned into something they had ever experienced before; it was raw and full of need. Mary's fingers tangled in his silky hair as his hands slipped down and gripped her hips. They dove in, an animalistic desperation for each other blossoming as all the light burst back into their worlds and years of suppressed passion bubbled forth. Mary was so caught up that she hadn't noticed Matthew backing her up and shuddered as her back hit the wall, aware that every inch of her was somehow in connection with his body. Her knees were weak, giving out under the heat and he sensed her slipping, so he lifted her slightly, enabling her to wrap her legs around his waist. The skirt on her dress fell to the side and Matthew's hands ran up and down the silky skin of her bare legs, sending shivers shooting up her spine. There was nothing but the intoxicating sensation of skin on skin, the flames of desire; there was nothing else left in the world in that moment, there was only Matthew and Mary. Nothing else mattered.

There was a bang on the door. They broke apart, startled back into the real world. They looked at each other with hazy eyes, breathing in ragged, broken gasps. Someone banged on the door again.

"What?" Mary called, her voice low and throaty; the sound of it sending an electric hum throughout Matthew's body.

"What are you two doing in there? There is a gentleman and lady asking for your friend," the intruder called.

"He'll be out in a minute." Mary responded, her eyes never leaving Matthew's. Still burning inside, Matthew rasped,

"What do we do?"

"Whatever we must," Mary breathed. Their faces were just centimeters apart and her warm breath blew across his chin, sending chills down the back of his neck. They stared at each other for a second more before coming together again, melting into each other and pouring out their souls.

"Matthew…"  
>"Mary, I have lost you too many times. I will not lose you again, whatever it takes; I am never letting you go again."<p>

"I would do anything for you," she responded quite simply.

"Please come home Mary, please come home with me. Please."

"Yes. Yes, of course."

"To England?"

Mary kissed him again, lovingly and gently.

"Of course my darling." She whispered, "home" she sighed, almost in awe of the idea.

"Come with me tonight. I cannot let you out of my sight, not now that I have found you."

"How scandalous," Mary smiled.

"This is America."

Mary laughed and unwound herself from Matthew's embrace, walked over to a rack by the dressing table and pulled on an old black coat. Matthew smiled when he recognized it; it was the coat she had worn the night he had saved Sybil all those years ago. The night they first kissed.

"Are you staying with the couple you were sitting with?" she asked as she straightened her dress and fixed her hair, re-pinning the rose.

"Yes, the Parkingsons. They are very accommodating, and I seriously doubt any abjection to having the famous Silent Rose stay under their roof."

"We had better hope so," she replied, holding the door open for him. She followed him out, taking his hand tightly as they walked back down the corridor out into the bustling world.

_Please review!_


	3. We Need to Talk

**I am truly ashamed that I let 3 weeks pass without updating this. So very sorry to everyone who has favorited/added this to their alerts. This chapter is the first of the explanations that must be made, so bear with me for a little. I really have no idea where this story is going to we shall just have to see where the wind takes it! Reviews are gold and a writer's bread and butter so please take the time! Thanks ;-)**

Heads turned as they made their way back to the table, curious whispers following them across the room. Molly's mouth dropped open in a most American fashion.

"John, Molly, may I introduce…" Matthew trailed off, not sure what to call her.

"Miss Mary Crawley, it's a pleasure to meet you," she finished politely. The omission of her marriage and title did not surprise Matthew; however it did serve to remind him of that particular obstacle.

"And you Miss Crawley. You must be a relation of Matthew's then?"

"Indeed, a rather distant cousin. We are great friends however." This made Matthew chuckle which earned him a questioning glance from Molly and a stern glare from Mary. Ignoring both, Matthew turned to John and asked, "Did you want to leave?"

"Yes, we were thinking it was time to call it a night."

"Would you mind terribly if Mary stayed with us for a few nights?" Matthew asked.

"If it isn't too much of a burden?" Mary added in her sweetest tone.

"Oh my, of course!" Molly squealed, "You are most welcome to come and stay, isn't she dear?" she asked, turning to her husband.

"Certainly, any friend of Matthew's is welcome in our home."

As Matthew's arm wound around her waist, Mary couldn't keep the ecstatic smile off her face.

The car ride home was a happy affair, with Mary and Molly talking very animatedly. Mary deflected almost every personal question flung at her with stunning skill, flawlessly keeping the conversation on anything but her. They talked mainly of fashion and when Molly slipped in a question about the necklace's origin, Mary did not try and deflect it, simply saying, "It was a Christmas gift from someone extremely dear to my heart. It sparkles so beautifully under the stage lights; I cannot resist wearing it whenever I perform. I will not deny it means a great deal to me."

Matthew smiled and turned to the window to hide the blush that was quickly coloring his face. Luckily his reaction went unnoticed as Mary swiftly praised the pair of earrings Molly had on, which turned out to have been a present from John. The Parkingson's house was not particularly big; however it was richly furnished and painted a perfect picture of the ornate life of a wealthy New Yorker. Mary was shown to a bedroom just opposite the hall from Matthew and the twinkle in both pairs of eyes promised that one room would certainly go unused.

"I am terribly sorry I cannot offer you anything bigger," Molly apologized while gesturing to the small, warm room, "but our main guest bedroom is already occupied!"

"Nonsense! This room shall do me perfectly. I do wonder if I might borrow a nightdress, I am quite unprepared!"

"Certainly my dear." Molly walked off down the hall leaving Mary standing by her door. As soon as she was out of sight Matthew came out of his room and crossed the hall in two long strides.

"We need to talk," he said softly into her hair as he pulled her in for a hug.

"Mmm, so much to say," she agreed. He looked over her shoulder into her room and smiled, "Come to me when the house has fallen silent. I have a nice couch by the fire in my room."

"I will," she whispered back before giving him a chaste kiss and pushing him away at the sound of footsteps drawing near.

"Until then," and he disappeared back into his room, closing the door behind him.

"This should do!" Molly handed over a very frilly nightgown with a knowing glance towards Matthew's door.

"Since tomorrow is Saturday the maid won't come in until 10:30. Everyone gets a sleep-in of Saturday," she informed Mary with a wink as she walked away down the hall.

"Have a nice night," Molly called over her shoulder. Mary's cheeks flamed at the implication and the fact that Molly had hit so close to the mark. She went into her bedroom and undressed, donning the white nightgown. It was very pretty, made of cool, soft linen decorated with delicate lace. Tucked in with the nightgown, Mary found a small set of makeup that Molly had provided her with. She graciously lent her some face powder, mascara and light pink lipstick. Mary removed her heavy stage makeup and replaced it with a light dusting of what she had been given. The resulting look reminded her of the light makeup she used to wear at home, letting a little of the old Mary shine through. She brushed her hair and pulled it into a lose braid that fell down her back. She sat at the vanity, staring into the mirror. She had told Matthew she would go back to England with him and she would in a heartbeat, but what about her husband? Would Matthew think she was worth all the hassle? She was sure Sir Richard would not go down without a fight, and could she really let him ruin her family? He would not want her back as a wife, he had very quickly grown tired off her; in fact he had helped her out, but on the lone condition that she never came back. She was willing to fight, but was he?

When the hall clock struck 1, the house had finally fallen silent and it was safe to leave her room. She hesitated momentarily outside his door before quietly stepping in. Matthew was sitting on the couch with his back turned, staring out at the sleeping city.

"I love the city," he said his eyes staying locked on the window, "I love the hustle and bustle, the noise, all the people. One can blend in the crowd or be part of all the excitement. I dreaded coming to live in the country; I thought it would be so boring and quiet. Now though, when I'm right back in the middle of it all, I want nothing more than to be back in Yorkshire." He turned and smiled at her. She walked over and sat down next to him, careful to leave space between them. They needed to talk, not repeat what had happened in her dressing room – however much they might want to.

"I always found that when I was at Downton I yearned for the rush of London and when I was in London, I longed to be back in the calmness of Downton. I miss it now more than ever. I fear that New York has cured me of any affection I had for cities."

"You don't like it here?"

"Not really. It has such a different feel from English cities and the people here are so rude. Not that it really matters though, I hardly ever go out."

"What on earth do you do all day then?"

"I read, manage all the accounts for the Silver Palace, and have become a rather skilled pianist."  
>"You manage the accounts?"<p>

"I do. Matthew do not look so stunned! I grew up watching my father run one of the largest estates in England!"

"Of course you did," he laughed before turning serious, "Are you happy here Mary? Really?" She thought for a long time, carefully deciding how to word what she was about to say.

"Matthew, I ruined the path to happiness many years ago. I am more _content_ than I have been in a long time, but no, this is not the life I want for myself."

"And what kind of life do you want?" Matthew asked as he shifted closer to her so their sides were touching. Mary instinctively pressed in closer to him.

"A life with you," she whispered, staring straight into his angelic eyes. Matthew leaned in and kissed her, softly, less urgently than before. He took his time to savor the taste of her, kissing her deeply and reveling in her touch. His fingers ghosted her bare arms, leaving a trail of goose bumps in his wake, finally coming to rest at the base of her neck. She leaned further forward to cup his cheek and his fingers slipped in to her hair, playing and knotting in the silken strands. She sighed and pulled back.

"Matthew. I am married, remember?" she reminded him, eyes unfathomably sad.

"No you aren't, not anymore."

"Whatever do you mean?" Mary asked astonished.

"Well, Sir Richard led us to believe that you were…" he paused and when he continued it came out quiet and strangled, "_dead_. And then news came that he had married again. I didn't know how that could have been done, it didn't make sense. Your family took it as a final confirmation that you were dead but, I, well…" he looked at her, eyes swimming, "I wasn't giving up so easily. I went down to London to talk to Carlisle but when he refused to see me, I was forced to visit some old friends at a high profile law firm. One of my old school mates acknowledged the strange circumstances and owed me a rather large favor, so he looked into it."

"What did he find?" Mary asked in a hushed tone.

"That he had your marriage privately annulled on the grounds that you were believed to be deceased. My friend said the whole thing was extremely shady but it all seemed legal."

Mary fell back against the couch in shock. She couldn't comprehend it; her hands began to tremble as she locked eyes with Matthew.

"So, you mean… I'm free?" she whispered. "I can't believe… after all this time… we can…" she blushed as the last words tumbled out of their own accord.

"We can finally be together." His voice was low and husky; and with her natural and un-constricted form lying before him, he just couldn't resist. Leaning forward over her, they come in contact again, giving into each other once more. They could feel a promise in their embrace; the promise of a life filled with love. Matthew slid his arms beneath her, shifting her so she lay in the crook of the couch and he was above her. She loved the feel of his weight pressing down on her and she gladly succumbed to his caresses, kissing him back with unrestrained passion. Everything felt right, his warmth, his smell, his lips moving in perfect synchronization with hers, the way his hands stroked her from shoulder to hip. Her own fingers fluttered about his strong shoulders and found the edge of his collar, following it around to the opening at the front. Without ever consciously deciding, her fingers began to work their way down the buttons, slowly revealing what lay underneath. As the tips of her fingers came in contact with his warm skin, a chilling memory jumped forth from the recesses of her mind. She gasped and pushed him back gently.

"Matthew wait, stop." She panted, searching his eyes. "Did you ever receive my letter?" she asked, biting her lip.

"Ah yes," he sighed, sitting back so he was no longer atop her. Shortly after she had disappeared he had visited Downton to see the family and offer his condolences. He had been alone and not bothered to open Crawley house, so he stayed at the great house. He was surprised to see an envelope slipped under his bedroom door on the second night of his stay. Upon picking it up he recognized the hand writing immediately and flung the door open only to find Anna nearing the end of the corridor. She turned and gave him a slight nod before turning the corner and continuing on with her work. He had retreated into his room and hastily read the letter. It detailed the reasons that had caused her to hesitate in accepting his proposal. That included the affair with Kemal Pamuk. He had been stunned at first, but the more he thought about the matter, the more its insignificance seemed to grow. He pulled her up into his arms and held her tightly.

"I'm glad I found out when I did. I cannot lie, had you told me in 1914, I do not know what my reaction would have been. But I was a prig, and those years in the war changed me, changed how I see everything. A matter such as that, it has no effect on me now." He looked down at her and she smiled, tears forming at the corner of her eyes. Matthew caught them with his finger as they slipped out.

"May I ask your reasons for accepting Carlisle? Did you love him?

"Matthew, I had to secure my future. Protect my family's name."

"But Carlisle? Why him?"

"He knew. He stopped the story from getting into the papers once, and then it fell to me to keep it from the headlines."

"It fell to you?"

"I married him or I let him ruin my family's name and any chance Edith had at a happy marriage. Those were my options, what would you do?"

"Tell someone! Mary, he was blackmailing you!" Matthew was furious with that awful man.

"Who was I to tell? The whole point was to keep it secret so the only person that left was Mama, and do you think she would tell me to destroy my family? The mistake was mine and so I alone must live with the consequences." Matthew was stunned by her loyalty to her family.

"I am afraid of what he will do when he hears I'm back," she continued, looking down at her hands.

"For a start, with what you have just told me, your family can have Sir Richard arrested for blackmail. With any luck, we should be able to get him before the story hits the press."

"The minute he hears I'm home, the orders will be given. That was part of the deal."

"_The deal?_"


	4. Joy and Unhappy Truths

**Here it is, for those of you who are still listening! My only excuse is that finals have swallowed me whole, and my muse seemed to get lost in the recesses of my jumbled mind. Please excuse any errors; I am without a beta at the moment. Thanks so much to those of you who have followed and reviewed, it means so much to me! Maybe a few more reviews might tempt me to post a little faster… ;-))! Alright, I'll stop rambling and get on with it. Hope you like it! **

"What deal Mary?" Matthew demanded after an impossibly long silence. Mary sighed and looked away.

"Richard fell in love with another woman. The girl he has married I assume, and he was tired of me. He knew I was not happy and so he proposed a deal. He would pay for a ticket across the Atlantic to New York if I left him to his own devices and promised never to return. When I agreed, he showed me the story he had already written and said that the moment he heard any news of my return, the story would hit the press."

"And so you just packed up and left? Without saying goodbye?"

"How could I? It was a secret, and going back one last time and knowing that was the end – it was just too hard. Too know what I was to become, too be reminded of everything I was leaving behind, I was weak I know but I was trying to keep a positive outlook on the fact I was running to a world I have never known without a single friend. And now I find out that I don't even have a husband, I am truly alone."

"How can you say that? You aren't alone, you have me. And you will face the scandal at home with a new husband by your side."

"Matthew… are you…?"

Matthew smiled and slid off the couch, dropping to one knee before her. He pulled her soft hands into his.

"You are perfect in every way and I promise to love you though thick and thin, come hell or high water, scandal or war. Lady Mary Crawley, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

"Oh Matthew, yes!" Mary whispered, unable to raise her voice any louder. Her smile was so big her cheeks hurt, and for the first time in her life she cried tears of joy. He scooped her up into his arms and kissed her, a kiss that seemed to go on and on. Matthew whipped her tears away and set her back down on the couch, getting back down to business.

"Now that that's settled," he said with a satisfied grin, "in the interests of yourself alone, how would you feel if the story was to be exposed?"

"Myself? With the exception of Papa, the people I care about already know. Honestly, I should be relieved to have the weight off my shoulders."

"And if people know we are to be married, the blow would be lessened, right?"

"Most certainly, people don't care much for the past disgraces of married women. But it would still ruin Edith's prospects."

"Mary, Edith was married a month before I arrived here. Too a rising inventor; you should see them, they really are quite the pair."

Mary was stunned. For the first time, this whole situation and the way out of it seemed real. Having collected the information, Matthew's eyebrows furrowed as he tried to come up with a plan. Mary watched as he mindlessly played with her fingers and it lit a spark in her, called forth a primitive instinct that had lay long suppressed. She smiled and climbed onto his lap, gently smoothing his forehead.

"That can all be sorted in the morning. It's been so long since I've seen you, how are you?" She asked, changing the subject and eager to hear about life back at home.

"Right now, there are no words to express how happy I am," he answered in between laying soft kisses on her neck. She sighed and let her head fall back, however; the fact he had not answered her question did not go unnoticed. She pulled back and looked him in the eye.

"I'm glad to hear it. But how have you been? Honestly, don't you dare lie to me Matthew Crawley?"

"The estate is thriving, and I'm making more money in law than ever before. My position is giving me more opportunities than I ever imagined, including the chance to come here. On the outside everyone seems happy; your parents seem happy, I seem happy, but no one really is." He met her eyes and continued. The way it all fell out told Mary he had kept it all in for a very long time; his beautiful eyes were brimming with tears.

"God knows I haven't been happy. I felt nothing; it was if I had _died_. Mother pointed out one day that I had become nothing more than a ghost, walking around like the living dead."

"Why?" Mary whispered, even though she already knew the answer.

"It was all too much. When I returned from France, my mind was full of unspeakable horrors, but seeing life go on at Downton, it gave me hope – hope that I could be whole again. Things were looking up. But then everything came crashing down again, seeing how unhappy you were, Lavinia's death, your wedding, and then your disappearance. I handled it in the only way I knew, the only way I could, I froze up and stopped feeling." A single tear slipped out the corner of his eye and Mary kissed it away.

"But now I feel everything," he went on. "I feel everything and its overwhelming, it's so much, so sudden, I almost cannot comprehend it."

"Oh my darling," Mary whispered, at a total loss for words. His confession broke her heart, and she swore to herself that she would do everything in her power to heal him. He buried his face in her neck, pulling her around him, consumed by her touch. They stayed silent for an immeasurable amount of time, Mary simply holding Matthew close. Eventually he pulled back.

"And how have you been my dear?" he asked her softly. She closed her eyes.

"Much the same I'm afraid," she sighed. Becoming very interested in the wallpaper behind Matthew's head, she continued, "My job pays well and I live very comfortably. I have learned to take care of myself, and my independence gives me a sense of gratification that I never thought it could. But every day is a battle to keep my mind in the present, for if I were to look back, I should drown in regret and guilt. So I carried on as I have every day since that awful summer in 1914; I put on a brave face and live alone inside my head."

"Since 1914…" he muttered, amazed at her strength. "9 years," he said, looking her in wonder, "such a long time."

"I confess; it has been a difficult punishment to bear. But God knows I deserve it," she sighed, meeting his eyes again.

"Mary, there is _no way_ you deserved that. I would say a good shouting at and bed without supper would have heartily sufficed. Not nine years of silence, a sham of a marriage, and exile from your home," he responded, his voice full of conviction.

"Well, it's all in the past and I should like to keep it that way. Soon we will be home and maybe, with a bit of luck, everything will be as it should be." She smiled.

"And how should it be?" he grinned mischievously as he banned all dark thoughts from his mind. Mary caught up to his mood instantly and followed his lead.

"I think it should be like this…" she hummed as her mouth glided along his jaw, laying soft kisses on the soft skin and gently nibbling on his ear. Her warm breath tickled his skin and heightened his senses.

"I believe it should be more like this…" he told her as he gained the upper hand, running his fingers up and down her arms, sucking on the spot where her pulse pounded in her neck. Her head fell back and Matthew pulled at the ribbon that held her braid and let it fall out, spilling her dark hair across her shoulders. They continued their battle for dominance, oblivious to everything but the intoxicating feeling of each other. Coherent thoughts long gone, Matthew picked Mary up and carried her over to the giant, plush bed. They tumbled down into the masses of pillows, molding into each other and succumbing to the fire that raged inside. Pulling back, Matthew looked at the beauty beneath him. Her dark hair was fanned out behind her head, eyes shining and cheeks flushed. He lowered his head, brushing his lips to hers in the sweetest, gentlest kiss as rational thought returned. Mary had been shown nothing but the worst side of man, been let down and mistreated by every man she had ever met, with the exception of her father – and even his record was not clean. Upon this realization, Matthew firmly resolved to love her with every fiber of his body and worship her with all the respect she deserved. Once more he lifted his head.

"Mary," he whispered, gazing into her eyes, "I will do this properly. I love you. I love you and I shall do forever more. But I won't take you until you are my wife, after all you have been through, I will treat you with the respect you deserve." He was looking down at her with such reverence and love that Mary couldn't contain the tears that slipped from her eyes.

"I love you too," she whispered, voice trembling under the force of her emotions. Matthew kissed her tears before grazing her lips one more time, lowering himself next to her. She rolled to face him, trying to stifle a yawn.

"Will you let me stay with you tonight?" She asked with a sleepy grin.

"I suppose…" Matthew grinned back, not being entirely strong enough to resist such a tempting proposal. Mary sighed contentedly as she settled in his arms, inhaling the sent that could only be described as his. They listened to each other's breaths, gradually falling under in perfect harmony. When Matthew woke the next morning, he had a plan.

**TBC…**

**Reviews are love! **


	5. The Plan

**I cannot say how much I appreciate the reviews you guys have left; it most certainly kicked my butt into gear with this chapter. I tried something I've never done before, just showing glimpses of conversations at the end of the chapter, so some feedback on whether or not I did a descent job with that would be absolutely fantastic. So here we go, Matthew's rescue plan! Enjoy!**

Mary drifted awake to find herself tucked safely into Matthew's warm embrace. She lay contentedly for a little while, enjoying the feeling of Matthew's fingers skimming the soft skin of her arm. When she finally decided to look up, Matthew was staring at the ceiling, brow furrowed in deep concentration. She smiled and reached up to lay her fingers gently on his cheek, disrupting his thoughts. He looked down and smiled. When their eyes met, his smile grew into such an open and honest look of affection that Mary was rendered completely powerless by it.

"Good morning darling," she murmured, the endearment slipping naturally from her lips.

"Good morning," he returned, overwhelmed by the sheer joy of holding her in his arms.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Mary inquired softly. Matthew resumed his look of deep thought.

"I am trying to find a way to get you back to England without hurting your family's honor," he replied.

"Any good ideas?"

"I think so, and I've somewhat made a plan; and you know, it just might work."

"Oh? And what is this daring rescue plan, pray tell?"

He looked at her seriously for a moment before continuing.

""I haven't worked out the exact details yet, but if you took a false name and came back with me via Ireland, you could hide out at Sybil's while I return to England to gather a case against Carlisle and have him arrested on charges of blackmail. After all that has been taken care of, I will bring you back home and we shall marry."  
>"I should like to stay with Sybil," Mary said, mulling over Matthew's plan. "But won't Carlisle publish the minute he gets a whiff of what you are doing?"<p>

"Mary dear, you forget that I am a lawyer and it is my trade to collect information against people, be it in broad daylight or under the table and if need be, I will gladly hire a private detective."  
>"And I'm just to sit quietly in Ireland while you fight Carlisle? That could take years Matthew! I can't just sit back as you dance with the devil; I want to stand at your side!" Mary exclaimed whilst pulling herself up into a sitting position. She looked back down at him. He smiled; he had known that she would despise the idea of not playing a role.<p>

"You would only stay in Ireland until the _devil_," he grinned at Mary's choice of words, "has been arrested and the police ban his papers form publishing the story. Then I will need you at my side, for your testimony is essential!"

"How long must I wait?"

Matthew thought carefully for a minute.

"If I hire a private detective – it should take a month and a half to get Carlisle behind bars, or at least banned from publishing." Matthew held out his arms and she settled back into his embrace.

"A month and a half…" she sighed.

"It's really not that long – in comparison. But it might not even take that long; honestly it's hard to say."

"I suppose not. Will you write to me in Ireland?"

"Every day"

"Alright then I'll sit quietly," she conceded with a sigh, "but for heaven's sake, let's not waste anymore time."

Matthew chuckled, he was well aware of the time they had squandered.

"How much longer are you staying in New York?" she asked.

"I'm here until the case I'm on is finished. The ruling is tomorrow and then another lawyer will take over from there. I was planning on booking my crossing for next week."

"You haven't booked your crossing yet?"

"No, I didn't know how long the case would keep me here. And now I'm glad I didn't, for I certainly wouldn't have stopped over in Dublin!"

"But now you shall, and what excuse will you give?" Mary inquired.

"That I am seizing the perfect opportunity to see my dear cousin of course."

"And what about me?"

"I have fallen in love with a beautiful young music student from a respectable family who sent their daughter to study in the city. I may be the next earl of Grantham, but that doesn't erase my middle class background," he said with a mischievous smile. "Now I am bringing her back home to make her my Countess," he finished.

"But you are leaving her in Ireland?" Mary asked with her eyebrows raised, unable to resist smiling.

"She has distant family that she wants to visit. Urgent matters have unfortunately required me to return home before her."

"My, my, you have given this some thought haven't you?"

"The more I talk about it; all the pieces just fall into place."

Mary twisted and kissed him, sweetly, desperately trying to convey all her gratitude. When she pulled back, just one question remained.

"What are you going to tell my family?" Mary asked when suddenly a terrible thought tore at her mind. "Will they even want me back? What if my story does get out, and they hate me for bringing disgrace upon the family?"

"Mary," Matthew said, twisting so he could look directly into her eyes, "your family would do _anything_ to have you back. They all feel as if it's their fault and I promise – scandal or no scandal – they will be beyond ecstatic to see that their girl is alive. Don't forget, your family has resigned themselves to believing that you are dead."

Mary simply kissed him in return as tears pricked at the corners of her eyes.

"Now, what to tell your family," Matthew continued, "in the interest of keeping this all under wraps; Sybil will need to be told in full extent and I will personally tell your mother and father upon my arrival. But it should go no further than that – Edith, Cousin Violet – they must be kept in the dark. I suppose I'll have to let my mother know the bare essentials."

"Granny won't appreciate that."

"Mmm, well the only way to keep a secret is to not tell anyone."

"I suppose that's true."

"When I write to Sybil, I won't tell her it's you and I'll ask her to not speak of our arrival. Will she be able to keep the secret?"

"You needn't worry about that. Sybil is probably the most trustworthy person I've ever met. She won't tell."

"Then we have our plan."

Mary returned to her room just moments before the maid walked in, just after 10:30. Molly had been kind enough to give the maid a dress for Mary, and she dressed quietly, enjoying having her hair done properly done for the first time in a year. She was the last one down for breakfast.

"Good morning," she said brightly as she entered the room.

"Good morning, I hope you had a good night," Molly responded.

"I slept very well and thank you so much for the dress."

"Not at all, it looks lovely on you. I was thinking that after the men leave for court we could go and fetch some more of your things. I do hope you will stay until the week is out," Molly offered with a kind smile.

"That is too kind, I should love to stay."

"Molly, I was rather hoping to purchase a new dress today," Mary said as they climbed into the car with a collection of Mary's belongings, "and I would very much value your opinion."

"Oh yes!" Molly squealed, "I just love shopping for new dresses!"

"I've had a letter from Sybil."

"Oh?"

"She writes that she would be delighted to welcome us. Of course she wants to have my fiancée to stay and that it will be a lovely treat for little Daniel and Mary."

"Mary?"

Matthew's eyes softened as he took her in her arms and whispered in her ear,

"You've not been forgotten my dear. Sybil gave birth to a beautiful baby girl just a couple months after you disappeared; she insisted that she be named in your memory and Tom, as well as the rest of your family, heartily agreed."

"Of course… I forgot that they were expecting."

"She looks so like you."

Matthew Crawley and Rose Dawson boarded the Britannia cruise ship headed for Dublin, Ireland on March 1st – looking back only to wave to John and Molly – before turning their faces to the open ocean and leaving the past to be swallowed up in their wake.

"This really is an act worthy of Perseus," Mary whispered in his ear.

"It's time he stepped up. I fear the sea monster is about to try and take a bite," he murmured.

Fingers entwined, together they braced themselves for the coming storm.

**TBC…**

**Just look at that review button… aren't you just dying to click it… ;-)**


End file.
